Well Fuck a Doodle Doo

I am not sure how exactly to type this up without violating several employee policies if I divulge anything too specific, but I should say first that I am still employed very gainfully, and that does not seem to be changing anytime soon.  What is changing, however, is the team I was working with, and most specifically, the ones I answer to.

It's a common thing in very large companies, like the global one I work for, to have people shuffled around seemingly suddenly.  Honestly, it just seems sudden, if you ask me.  I know behind the scenes they have to plan such changes out far in advance.  What isn't common is to build a bond of trust with your bosses.

My immediate supervisor knew everything about my home situation , my mother's deteriorating state, and my own battles with mental illness.  When we had to drag Mom to the hospital recently, I knew my boss would allow me to take a sudden week's vacation to deal with it... we'd built up that kind of a relationship, and he knew her history (mostly because I was hoping there was a way he could help me get out of my living area).  He granted me that, and my deadlines were extended, which was not a big deal.

Then during this unscheduled break, which wasn't a break for me as I was going to the hospital every day in Winchester and then zooming up the holler to feed these cats who hate me, spending about $400 in gas in a week, I saw something that made me realize that Everything Was Changing.

I felt immediate dread.  The last time I felt immediate dread about Everything Was Changing was in radio, and a few months after that, I was unceremoniously dumped.  Schadenfraude was smiling on me there, because the guy who unceremoniously dumped me was shortly, along with everybody he brought along in The Great Dumping of 2016, also themselves dumped because they sucked.  

Well, change things did, and now I have to train a new boss to like me and my weird life right now and why I am like this and just accept me even if I am mental.

And now I am sure I am never going to meet any of the people who hired me in the first place.

We have our regular meeting tomorrow, who knows how that will go, or even if it will happen, as a colleague also passed away this Saturday.  He was probably one of three or four people I worked with on the creative side since the company hired me, which was shortly after it started (My first message from my supervisor was January 1, 2017... I knew I was in it for a while by mid-February of that year).

I'm not sure bringing up my concerns for my own welfare if we have that meeting will be appropriate, but it might be the last time I talk to somebody I completely trust.  And then, even if I am getting paid well and doing a good job, I will still need to start all over again, just like in radio.

Just in case, Kelly will help me re-do my resume to focus on creative podcasting.  I shouldn't have ignored that recent posting for Wondery, I guess.  Hindsight is 20/20.

The Bat is out of hell

RIP Meatloaf, 1947-2022.  His name is Robert Paulson.

The Eternal Man from Earth

 I came across a Facebook memory recently about a weird cult film called "The Man From Earth" that Dale had introduced me to and I had forgotten about.  I watched it again (on the free Youtube version) and enjoyed it, but probably because it had so many Star Trek alumni in it.  I guess it was basically based on an interesting thought experiment... what would happen if you never died?

From what I've gleaned, this is usually the grounds for theology student debate teams, but it made a great movie if you can stand one that is mostly talking heads.  I tried watching the sequel they filmed in 2017, available on APrime... not as good, but okay.

I knew that Marvel's ETERNALS was this same kind of concept, but I'd forgotten that when I started the movie this morning, and when Pink Floyd's "Time" started playing, I switched it off and decided it was just a GotG ripoff.  Well, I also gave it a second chance, and it is not... although I cannot see how anybody who does not know the history of the Eternals will really appreciate it, especially the ones who haven't followed their recent Marvel histories.  Also the CGI Pip was painful to watch, worse than the CGI Bruce Banner head in the Hulkbuster armor.  I really doubt the Eternals will return, despite what the end card said, but I assume the Black Knight is coming, for whatever reason.  I should do research on the character and his Ebony Blade.

I wonder if I ever introduced Dale to one of my favorite cult films, Miracle Mile?  It would be interesting to know what he thought about it.

Holiday Road

 This is the first day of my first vacation week this year.  I just chose this week because I need to spend some vacation time and I do not want another calamity like last year, when I had to spend my entire vacation time in December when not much was happening work-wise anyway (or at least, not as much).

What I *should* have done was use some of these American Airline points to take a trip somewhere I want to move to, since COVID fear seems to be winding down for the vaxxed (me).   Increasingly I find my choices limited.  I had thought of Dallas again, but their mismanagement of their electric grid this past winter, plus the ultra-right conservatives in charge there, kind of really make me not want to go.  And of course all my friends moved and all that.  Los Angeles, I think I would like, and to return to San Francisco would be great too.  Expensive, though.  Same with Portland, expensive, plus, irritating Proud Boys all over the place (or Oath Keepers or whatever jerk-off club that was).

One on my radar has been Denver, because a.) legal pot would really help with my sleep issues, and b.) lots of cool concerts (music, comedy, and others) always go through there.  I am still considering that.  Perhaps take my next week off around my birthday and fly out there, spend a week exploring.  I know from previous visits I like the city already.

Weirdly, although Denver-Boulder seem to be twin cities close to each other, like Dallas-Fort Worth, Boulder seems to have the more expensive rent.  Maybe Boulder is the bigger city?  Who knows.

Anyway work is going great and I am constantly surprising myself by not repeating myself on my sound design, which seems impossible but there we have it.  Ask me to explain how I do it and I can only say "I have no idea."  Everybody I work with seems to like my stuff.

That's the update.

Dance in my Pants

 "And I don't ever wanna be rescued, I don't ever wanna be saved...

I got a feeling that I'm gonna be alive forever, dancin' on the edge of a grave..."

I'm really surprised that I am so unmoved by Jim Steinman's death.  Maybe it's because there's nobody in my life, besides my brother, to commiserate with, but also honestly, it's not like he was going to put out more stuff, you know?  He had a penchant for taking his older material and reworking it for a new audience, such as his vampire musical (based on The Fearless Vampire Killers even), which was originally just reworked Steinman songs in German.  

Seriously, when he made a hit, it was gold, but he'd just as often squeeze out a turd.  I never got into what he did with Sisters of Mercy, but that's understandable as it was goth and I am not.  It sounded well produced, but that's all I can say about it.  And that is a thing about his music, if he was the one producing the album, it would definitely sound stellar.  Hence the garbage train wreck of Bat Out of Hell III, which Meatloaf apparently just recorded a bunch of Jim Steinman's songs without his producer's touch.  I think I listened to the entire album once and never opened the CD case again.

So I have had lots of friends who have better taste in music than me.  That is, they were pretty snotty about their music and wouldn't really get into mine because of theatrical stuff like Jim Steinman.  I never understood that, especially with the ones who were Deadheads and thought the Grateful Dead were the best rock band of all time.  Fffffffffffffffffffffffffuck you guys.  Seriously, you turn your nose up at an Alice Cooper song like "The Last Man on Earth" because it's a humorous vaudeville romp about destitute homeless people, but you cream your panties when Mumford and Sons releases a Tiny Desk show on vinyl.  Whatever.

So anytime there were road trips it was time for another Iron & Wine marathon.  

My point is, maybe it's because I am no longer working in radio, but I am still surprised that I am not more moved by Jim Steinman passing.  His time was over anyway.

*******************

Everything else in my life seems to be going fine, especially work, where I am doing the best work I've ever done.  To think I used to do fart jokes for a living.  As of tomorrow I am fully vaccinated and can finally start seriously looking at where I want to move to.  I have a top-tier FICO score and a house down payment burning a hole in my pocket, just waiting for me to get out of here.  Crossing fingers Covid passes soon.

U R BLOKKD!!1!

 Am I, really?  Okay.  I will schedule the appropriate amount of therapy for this.

The Christmas That Almost Isn't

 I think watching this video accidentally ruined my brother's Christmas gift for me, dammit.